When I went to church for the first time since my late teens, it had been over 20 years since my last purposeful visit (weddings & funerals aside). Those first months in church I was still black with sin, and knew it, kinda. It's amazing what you learn to accept, do and feel as right when you're drifting in the world. So I knew I wasn't "perfect" but it was in church I realized the true horror of my sins. The actual effect they were having on my life and on the lives of those around me. And no I wasn't threatened with hell. Rather, I was taught about God's grace, and of the existence of sin and it's impact in this world.
As my eyes opened more and more, I was more and more shocked. Stunned. I couldn't believe I thought I was "ok" when in reality what I was busy with in my life was nothing short of demonic. And again, no one pointed this out to me from a podium- all they did was encourage me to seek God further, in Scripture, in the counsel of others, inside myself. All I did was respond to God's call- the Prevenient Grace embedded in me at conception.
I have come to see church as a critical part of my Spiritual life. When blogger Christian Piatt talks about going to church, he refers to a saying: "Going to Church doesn't make you a Christian any more than sitting in a garage makes you a car". I concur. Going there in itself doesn't qualify me for heaven, doesn't give me any special privileges or rights in the Kingdom of God- I don't earn "brownie points" with God for going. But it is in that environment where other things happened- where I was supported, enabled, freed to take risks by confessing my struggles, where I opened my soul up. I forget who said it: "Church is a safe place where one can take big risks". It is in the pews of my church where I was finally set free from the bondage of sin. Freed from the secrets, the lies, the captivity.
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